Dating

I wanted to stress some thing , which is very easy to overlook.

Dating is great. You get to meet cool people, get to know them even better, and have a wonderful time with them. Not to mention, the other things.

But there seems to be this trend, especially with people my age, where you always have to be dating. This isn’t true, for some reason it’s becoming the norm.

I’m no dating expert myself, but from what I do know is there is no rush to find the perfect person. With apps like Tinder, Bumble and Hinge, they want you to find a date. Sometimes, you are not ready to be dating someone, maybe you need to give yourself time to grow.

I started noticing this about a year ago l, when I’d be taking to a girl, and then would evaluate what I was saying; I wasn’t a man, I was a boy, with a feeble understanding of the real world. With that mindset, no girl is going to change your mind.

There’s always this rush to be in things. The rush to be in a relationship, the rush to hold someone before anybody else. If there is someone out there for you, let them know, but remember to check if you’re okay too. Life is too short to not go for chances, but it’s also too short if you mess them all up.

Go with your gut. But when you’re dating, check that you’re in the right place to date.

Growing Up

I may have touched on this topic before, But this evening I have realised the sad truth that I cannot act how I used to.

By now, my fellow readers would realise that I, like many of you, have been addicted to the Internet for all my life. I would spend hours online, watching and reading a whole load of bogus. This has amounted to my mind being filled with unecessary information that I do not require. It’s the sad truth, but do I really need to know a rumour that Jeffree Star slept with Kanye West? No, I didn’t think so.

This realisation means we have to cut the “fun” out of our lives, but instead, we have to moderate it. I have dreams and goals that I have not been pursuing to the maximum. That makes me sad, because I am wasting my time, and my life.

There is so much of life that I haven’t got to see yet. So many people and destinations I want to go to. I’m worried if I spend my life just stuck where I am now, nothing will change.

It’s funny. We spend so much time viewing others living the life we want to live, yet we don’t pursue it for ourselves. That is something I want to do from now. At the most heinous route, this careless attitude I have had is an act against self-love.

This is something everybody should focus on. If you do not love yourself and take care of yourself, then how can you expect yourself to take care of others?

Control yourself when it comes to acts of immediate pleasure which delegate away from the right decision. There is only so much our bodies and minds can endure before a total breakdown. As a collective and individual, we must get atop that.

Finally, on this post, I wanted to remind you all that I, am not perfect. I use this blog to explain my flaws and actions to combat them. There is the possibility that this mindset may fail, or I may slip up. That is fine, and it should not get you down, if this happens to you. I want us all to participate in a challenge I will be starting. It’s called “Deep Thought”.

For the next 30 days, I would like everyone to do these things:

  1. Find a time for mindfulness practice for at least 15 minutes
  2. Use this time to figure out what is the best action you should take next, write it down.
  3. When you come across a junction, think what is the best thing for my mind and body, choose that option. DO NOT GO FOR THE EASY OPTION!

Good luck ! 🙂

Instead of being who you were how about becoming who you want to be?

This is something I thought about on my run this morning. We get so comfortable with how we live, day by day, that when change comes about, it is scary and unwanted.

Take starting a new habit, or quitting something you used to do ( such as smoking). Instead of sticking with this new change, humans find it very easy to slip back into our old ways. We crave the easy-life , and linearity in our daily routine.

It is so hard to change, is usually the mentality that people have when they are trying to change something about themselves. But, maybe it isn’t so difficult. If you say something will be difficult, it is likely it will appear to be more difficult. Optimism and mindset can change the play of the game.

We revert back to our old ways because that is who we used to be, and we recognise how easy it is to be that person. With the action of smoking, you may be quitting due to health risks. It is easy enough to forget, or stop trying to smoke because it is just too hard. This isn’t the case. Every single day, people change, little by little. Nobody is the same person as they were 24 hours before. Taking the leap to commit a change, is one of the strongest attributes a human can have. The best part about it? It is free and anybody can do it.

It must come from within. When you want to do something differently (especially with resolutions) it is key to remember why you are doing it, and how it will change your life, for the bettter.

So instead of living who you were before, how about living the life you want to be. If you identify as a non-smoker, then stop smoking. If you are an athlete, better start working out. Keep these ideals in realistic terms, nobody out there wants to be a unicorn.

Start living your ideal life, it all starts with a change of mindset.

Birds and nature

Today, i was going to blog simply about getting outside in the morning to get some healthy vitamin d to start the day off right, but then something caught my eye. On the top of my window frame, a coal tit landed on the top, and began to sit there and eat. I thought it was astonishing, how this little creature has the capactity to fly at tenacious speeds, and then sit on top of my window like it was nothing. It was amazing!

I have never really studied birds. It was my uncle who first introduced the passionate admiration for these creatures. When we ( my sister and i) were younger, we would go on trips to go see different, rare species of birds. I did not appreciate it then, but i do now. Birds are awesome, and i am going to spend time learning all about them.

Moreover on the subject of nature, it is a breathtaking thing. When the sun rises and brightens anything and everything in its path, that is pure beauty and serenity. However, we take it all for granted now our lives are based indoors. Going out for a walk nad embracing the warm summers and cold winters is a luxury. We do not understand as a collective, that it can be taken away from us.

We know we are going to die someday, but we live like we are not. I am not going to tell you to abandon your office job, but i do suggest we change the way we work. Get outside, appreciate the fresh air and life. We do not have it forever.

Have an amazing day 🙂

Ikigai

Yesterday, I bought a book: Ikigai, written by Hector Garcia and Francesc Miralles. Today I finished this book, and it was truly one of the best reads I have had in a long time.

So, I thought I would delve into a bit about what the book entails and describes.

An Ikigai is the reason for your existence. It is the purpose you strive for in life, your meaning and role on this earth. Since your birth, your ikigai is said to be present inside you, and your life’s journey is the quest to find this meaning, and grasp it with open arms and never let go. The importance of finding this meaning is shown throughout, as it can lead to you living longer, and more fulfilling lives shown by the centenarians in the book.

However, the writers stress that you should not put stress upon yourself to find your Ikigai. Whilst it is important to look for it, attaching a negative emotion to it could undermine its importance. Moreover, the method of finding your Ikigai is through trying new things and experiencing life to the fullest. The book uses stoicism to remind you of your morality. One useful phase I found recently was ‘moment more’ or remember death. It is impertive to live life to the full, because this is the only way to live without regrets.

One of the most valuable quotes that I found from this book was “ichi-go ichi-e” which means ‘this moment exists only now and won’t come again. I will begin to implement this into my life, as to live in every moment and not take a second for granted. Only then, are you not afraid of death.

Finally, here are the tips that the book explains at the end to live a good life. I won’t go into too much detail, but these will be a reminder to you, and myself, how to live a good life. There is no secret other than to live, but these can aid you in success.

  1. Stay active and don’t retire – this keeps the brain active, swaying away from ageing.
  2. Take it slow – “walk slowly and you will go far”.
  3. Don’t fill your stomach – eat until about 80% capacity, this will keep you healthier.
  4. Surround yourself with good friends – good people = good results
  5. Get in shape for your next birthday- Hormones are released during exercise, making us happy.
  6. Smile – 🙂
  7. Reconnect with nature – Trust me, it will recharge your batteries
  8. Give thanks – This will help you be happy
  9. Live in the moment – today is all you have, make it worth remembering
  10. Follow your ikigai – your mission is to discover it.